I Sat on Johnny Depp’s Lap and He Fed Me Cake when I Was 6

Yep, you read that title correctly.

Source: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/79/Johnny_Depp_Deauville_2019.jpg

I guess you have some questions.

Well where to begin?

I grew up in Southern California. Burbank, to be precise. You know, the place where Nickelodeon, NBC, and Disney are. And that’s not exactly an exhaustive list of all the production companies and…